| Previous | Next | Patter Index | Home Page |
BETTER BEGINNINGS
PENNY PATTER
June 30, 2003
A Child Can Dream, Can’t He?
Parent involvement is important. Last week, I outlined some ways in which parents can be that revered “first teacher.” They are also published in our quarterly bilingual parent/community newsletter.
That said, let us wander further down the path. What about parents who themselves did not receive a decent education and are ill equipped to help their children? What about parents that treasure their children and pin all their hopes, dreams and ambitions on their potential, but are intimidated by a school system they don’t understand? What about the children of parents who are abusive? What about the children of parents who are not literate? What about parents working two or three jobs just to provide a roof and food? What about parents that are just learning English?
A Child’s Dream Can Come True
Each child, I believe, is the responsibility of each of us. No child’s dreams should be forfeited because the parent is poor, falls down, or is missing. Many of you do respond, using your talents and interests as per your calling, to invest in the present and give hope to the future. Bravo!
"Poor" children can achieve. I see it happen often. Frequently it is because someone in his life (i.e., a teacher, a friend, another family member, a mentor) has taken an interest and made a commitment. Bravo!
Our state, our courts really, believe that the early years are critical years, and that the State’s “poor” children are not being treated fairly. Lots of hope and funding is being funneled into the “Abbott districts” to provide all day Kindergarten, all day for four-year-olds and part-day for three year olds. Bravo!
Funding for Abbott is based on the percentage who qualify for free and reduced lunches in the school district. We in East Windsor Regional School District do not qualify, although we certainly have our pockets of poverty. I continue to believe that the funding should follow the child rather than be limited to those who qualify percentage-wise.
We have heard that it takes a village to raise a child. Others say that villages are outdated, that today it takes a team, because the idea of village has gotten lost in the cities. I say that we have a wonderful village. You are a Villager. Welcome to our garden!
Penny Pincher has made her own declaration of independence. She vows she will not be dependent upon credit cards, with their unwanted fees and charges. She thinks it resembles taxation without representation. She has not torn up her cards, though. She thinks they are great to have around in case of an emergency, or if she doesn’t have enough cash on hand, but she makes sure she pays them in full every month and on time.
Luck E. Penny, the mother of twins Penny Saved and Penny Earned, offers this idea for making an Independence Day shaker. Her young students (She is their first teacher) may roll up a double page in the newspaper into a tight roll. It will now resemble a long stick, but it doesn’t hurt like a stick if young students inadvertently and mistakenly decide to use it as a whacker instead of a shaker. They may then decorate it in whatever way they choose. One idea is to diagonally roll some crepe paper around it. Many shorter lengths of crepe paper may be glued to the top as a decoration that waves in the wind when shaken. For Independence Day, this is cute in red, white and blue. Young student may also wish to cut out some stars to glue to his creation. Whatever young student chooses, it will be just ducky (sorry, don’t groan). Luck E. gives particular attention to encouraging the twins to name the colors, count the lengths of crepe paper, and is assured that they are developing fine motor control with all that rolling and cutting. They may even work cooperatively.
Please fill it in the blank.
If you foster creativity and imagination in a child, he will …………………
To be added to our newsletter mailing list, to offer a tip for the Pincher, to offer ideas for Luck E. Penny's chicks, to volunteer, to make contributions, to respond or offer suggestions for this column, write to me at bewith@mail2peace.com or PO Box 187, Hightstown, N. J. To find out more about Better Beginnings, visit our website (volunteer webmeister Liston Abbott) at www.princetonol.com/groups/bbcdc.
June 17, 2003
Try, Try Again!
We want to do well at the task before us. We want our children to succeed. In this month of transitions, as our children go from one stage to another, we want to do everything we can to assure that they reach their full potential.
If they - and we - are to achieve, we must be willing to take risks. We must be ready to accept failures as steps on the way to success.
That is tough! We don’t want to “lose”, even any inch. We want to WIN. If we think a failure as one step on the way to success, perhaps it will be easier to take the risk.
A valuable gift for every graduate, every child, every one of us, is to have enough self esteem to be able to take risks and accept failures without damage to self-confidence and self-assurance. And with enough gumption to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and ……… make another stab at it.
Some of us did not get that gift until “later on.” We want to give our children that gift NOW. To increase their feelings of self-worth and self-esteem, we assure them and reassure them. We encourage them. We bring attention to their attributes. We show that we value their willingness to try and keep trying.
We subscribe to the theory of multiple intelligences and varied learning styles. We believe that every one has a valuable gift to contribute to the whole. We hope that every one of “our children” carries that thought and belief with them into the “big world”, and forever. We hope that the “big world” will value them as we do.
Home Runner Hitter Tries Out
What is success? Babe Ruth hit 714 home runs. I guess we could say he was a successful home run hitter. But did you know that he also struck out 1330 times? Striking out is part of hitting home runs? Interesting.
Worth a Try
If you speak words that bind and heal, if your words are like rich fragrant oil that soothes the world around you, you will find your own heart more peaceful and still. This positive consequence is a paraphrase from Thoughts for Meditation, Renee Miller.
A Trying Time It is not easy to say good-bye to Binnie Thom and her husband, “Buster” Vaccaro. And so we will not. She has retired from the East Windsor School District, and has resigned from our Board of Directors where she has served more than twenty years. Both Binnie and Buster have been constant advocates, dependable and committed workers, and a great source of strength and support, through thick and thin. Binnie’s expertise as an educator has been invaluable, and her appreciation of the devotion and dedication of Better Beginnings’ staff has been transforming. The imprint of both Buster and Binnie will live on forever. So we do not bid a fond farewell. We bid a fond “See you later”.
We love you. We will be in touch.
We are very grateful to Pete Bussone who provided and served a beautiful meal ala Macaroni Grill for our Thom/Vaccaro Appreciation Event.
Try Volunteering!
How many 5-year-olds do you know who can speak and even read in two languages? Come to Better Beginnings and we will introduce you. With the help of volunteers, our Spanish-speaking children are learning English, and our English-speaking children are learning Spanish. We need your help, especially this summer, regardless of what language or languages you speak. Help children who are emergent readers learn to read in their second language. The rewards are great! (Your self-esteem will flourish, for sure.)
Try Blowing Bubbles!
Our kids LOVE blowing bubbles. Penny Pincher suggests that we mix our own with · 1/2 C. Water · 1/2 C. Liquid Detergent · 1 Tbl. Cooking Oil. Soda straws are great for blowing through.
Tried, True and Trustworthy
Many community friends fall in this category. Without them, Better Beginnings would not have survived and thrived. One of these friends is a beautiful young lady, Amy Pennenga, who began her association with us as a volunteer. She has continued her support in many ways, especially through her Church, St. Paul’s Lutheran. This week she brought a large collection of coins and many other items she had collected for us. Thank you for being such a good friend, Amy!
Susan Lloyd is another. She finds many, many ways in which to advocate for us and be a good friend. This week, she and her family made a very generous contribution in Honor of Binnie Thom, a fellow member of our Board of Directors. We will use it to help complete our playground.
“Mr. Jonathan” Craig is also a good friend who spreads our message far and wide. He is, for instance, directly responsible for Daphne Tousand’s learning of our project of Digital Inclusion so that she donated a usable Cannon computer which, with the help of volunteer computer whizzes will bring still another of young students and their family across the digital divide, with all the learning opportunities a computer offers.
Our goal is to have a usable computer in the home of every one of our young students. We think it will make a difference. It’s worth a try.
If you have an idea you want to share, a positive consequence you want to add, a tip for the Penny Pincher, please write to me at bewith@mail2peace.com, or POBox 187, Hightstown NJ 08520. If you would like to know more about Better Beginnings, our website is www.princetonol.com/groups/bbcdc. Our worthy volunteer webmeister is Liston Abbott.
June 10, 2003
"What a bunch of losers!"
One reason I don't much like watching competitive sports anymore is that someone always loses. I also object to hurtful putdowns. So you can imagine how much I dislike statements like "What a bunch of losers!" or "He is such a loser." According to what or whose standards, I wonder.
Another thing: If someone runs just 1/10 of a minute slower than someone else, how can that someone be considered a "loser"? Especially if both he and "the winner" have just run faster than anyone has ever run before? At Better Beginnings, we call that being the second winner. If 15 kids are racing, we have first winner, second winner, third winner, and so on, until we reached the 15th winner. Anyone, we think, who gets out there and runs the race is a winner.
We even set up musical chairs so that no one loses. No sitting on the sidelines for our kids! Chairs are set in two back-to-back rows, and none are taken away. The kids get just as much fun, getting up and marching and dancing around the chairs and then scrambling for a chair when the music stops. I have a list of win-win games that encourage each child to enjoy the process and do their best. Of course you may have a copy. Just write to me at bewith@mail2peace.com or PO Box 187, Hightstown NJ 08520.
Smilers never Lose
We are getting feedback on the positive consequence, "If you smile, someone will smile back at you." The returns are even greater, according to our "Mr. Jonathan", J. B. Craig. He reports seeing a child acting out in the supermarket. His mother was yelling at him, but he still misbehaved. "Mr. Jonathan" said he just looked at him and smiled. The boy smiled back, yes; he also ceased the unwanted behavior. I think we've hit on something here!
Sylvia Weiss, another of our heroes, always seems to have a beautiful smile. She reports that when walking along, she smiles while musing about something she is thinking about. When she meets someone, she says, most of them smile back. Sylvia spreads sunshine wherever she goes. A good bit lately has been spread at Better Beginnings when she and her sisters from Hadassah come every week to read to the children. The children really look forward to those visits. Reading to children yields great benefits, especially for those who are learning to speak two languages.
More readers are needed. You would be surprised what one hour a week (or more, if possible) can do. It will make you -and us- smile.
Positive Consequences are Winners
Mrs. Weiss's addition to our growing list of Positive Consequences:
If you exercise and eat healthy foods, you will enjoy good or better health.
If you try to make a friend feel good, it comes right back to you.
If you wish you wash your hands thoroughly and often, you will have fewer colds.
Positive Consequences are our own "hybrid", blending natural and logical consequences with positive reinforcement. Please join in. See address above.
Penny Pincher Loses It!
Crayon Marks on the wall? Instead of yelling, the pincher just dips a damp rag in baking soda, applies a little pressure, and voila! the marks get lost!
When Children Hurt, We All Lose!
Children are often powerless, and need for us to speak up for them. Sometimes as adults, we might not want to say something to another adult for fear of hurting their feelings or our relationship with them. Or maybe we don't want to "get into other people's business". Well, I say, children are our business. The number to call if you think a child may be being abused is 1-800-392-2721. It can be anonymous. We have that number pasted on each of our telephones. The local police are also very responsive. It is our responsibility as teachers and as citizens to report. Another important number is Parents Anonymous. If you, as a parent or caretaker think you are losing it, a call to this number will help you: (609)243-9779.
Our Friends Have Winning Ways
Helping us in our project to bridge the digital gap, computer donations topped our list this week. One of them came from Bernard Wright, through our friend "Mr. Jonathan".
Our friends from the Junior Friday Club, Misty Malanga and Angela Herson, joined in our Read to Children Project this past week, and added an afternoon snack to their giving pack. Thank you! Reading is a gift that keeps on giving.
My smiles turned into happy grins as we began to get notification of pledges to United Way in which Better Beginnings is designated. They included, from IBM, K. B. Brushi; from Merrill Lynch: Michele Madonia, Lesley Gross, Kenneth Jacob and Carla Sirman; from Johnson & Johnson: Ted Lucas and Debbi Martinez, and from Schering-Plough, Niambi Daniels.
Will and Ondina Jeffers made their regular, dependable, monthly pledge, also, for "our children." ". Jose Arevalo continues to help with our food program with milk and paper goods. Pete Bussone continues to think of many ways to help, including meals and fresh fruit for the children. Al Werner brings us bread every week. Delores Murphy brings us many goods, including toys and a folding table.
Bless you every one! May your hearts sing with the joy you share!
Better Beginnings is a not-for-profit child care center serving our community since 1967. Visit www.princetonol.com/groups/bbcdc for more information.
June 3, 2003
-Positive Reinforcement can be Addicting1-
From minute one of the first day in class, Robby attached himself to my right side. Now we are at lunch. He is, of course, sitting to my right, putting him at the head of the table. The four-year-old speaks little and is eager to please. He is well behaved and orderly. He excels at physical and fine motor skills, and is quickly progressing with his cognitive skills. He is shy. If I could have only one objective for him for this year I will spend with him, it is this, "To increase his self-esteem and self-confidence."
I glance at him. I notice that he is gobbling down his food, using only his fingers. I think that I would like for him to learn to use his fork, but the last thing I want to do is hurt his feelings or call negative attention to his table manners. Because he is so eager for my approval, I fear that anything slightly negative could inflict incredible damage.
The concept of "positive reinforcement" flicks across my brain. (This is, you surmise, some years in the past.) I look straight across the table at John. I say, "I see that John is using his fork!" I glance around the table. I note that ALL of the children seated at my table are now holding and using their forks. I go around the table, mentioning each name, recognizing their skill with the fork. When I get around to Robby, you guessed it. He, too, was using his fork! I now have made a positive statement to every child at the table, and have refrained from making even one damaging negative comment.
I was hooked!
Oh, by the way, we had a great year, Robby, John, all the other children, and me. Robby went on to do well in school, and the last I heard was going on to study accounting. I am sure he will do well.
-Accentuate the Positive!-
Little wonder, I suppose that I try to find the positive, and pose "suggestions" in the affirmative. You know. Instead of saying, "Don't Run.", say "Walk." Sometimes little kids need to hear more about what TO do than what NOT to do. Sometimes we tell kids not to get wet when we might well be suggesting how to stay dry. You know.
-Positive Discipline Grows Positive People-
Positive Reinforcement is effective discipline. So is offering choices, and using natural and logical consequences. Combining these forms makes sense to me. Here are some more ideas for positive consequences from our loyal fans and advocates. These promote self discipline and good habits:
If you put your toys away, they will be easy to find when you look for them next time. (Carol Jones)
If you help me clean up after dinner I will have more time to play a game with you. (Marsha Fais)
If you do your homework, you will get better grades, and you will enjoy playing later, knowing that you have done an important thing first. (Liston Abbott)
If you read, your knowledge/vocabulary will grow. (Susan Lloyd)
-Makes Cents!-
Pretty Penny especially loves this one from Susan Lloyd: "If you save your pennies, you will save many dollars. And then share them with Better Beginnings!" Which she and her children regularly do, by the way.
With contributions from Joyce and Liston Abbott, and from Sunny Young Deli, our penny collection has now grown to 1,490,491 with $482.55 marked for the playground expansion. As always, we are grateful.
-A Surprise Outcome-
Did King Solomon have ice? If he had, he might have known that if you "churn" the right combinations of cream, milk, sugar and vanilla, you will get ... ice cream! Here, from Penny Candy, is the recipe:
1/2 cup milk;
1/4 cup half and half;
1 tablespoon sugar;
1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract;
2 sandwich size zip bags;
1 one gallon size zip bag;
ice;
1 tablespoon salt.
Put one small bag inside the other and add the contents, except ice and salt. Make sure both bags are firmly shut, without air. Add ice and salt to larger bag and place smaller bag inside. Seal firmly. Shake it! The ice cream will be ready in 5 - 10 minutes.
If you have suggestions, ideas for Penny Pincher, ideas for positive consequences, or stories of effective positivism, please let me know: bewith@mail2peace.com .
-Thank you Special Friends!-
Al Werner continues to provide bread for the children every week, and Pete Bussone, good friend, and Regional Manager for Macaroni Grill, makes a weekly habit of assuring that our children have fresh fruit, and that our staff members and board members feel appreciated. Dr. David Abalos also remembers us in many ways, this time with a computer and a large educational toy. Frances Rios and Minnie Bell remember us and their uncle and brother, Jimmy Jackson, in a very real way: with their regular monthly contribution to our small, but growing, endowment fund. Our dream is that one day it will be large enough to provide enough dividends to help us meet expenses.
-A Special Thank You to Prince Hall Grand Lodge-
Until it does, meeting our expenses with reduced revenue, continues to be a problem. We are very grateful to everyone who has come to our rescue with contributions. This week, we send our special gratitude to M. W. Prince Hall Grand Lodge for their contribution of $500, and especially to Junior Grand Warden Homer Justice, our faithful advocate.
-Congratulations Christian Aguirre-
Best player of the Voorhees Soccer Tournament! We are very proud of this young man with his determination, shining disposition, courtesy, and positive attitude. Christian is a graduate of Better Beginnings, and his Mom is our Bilingual Coordination and Co-Director of Education. Congratulations to the family, the coaches, the young players, and his team, backers, the East Windsor PAL Fire Company, all. Thank you for your teamwork and investment in our youth and for encouraging them to reach their full potential.
| Top of Page | Previous | Next | Patter Index | Home Page |